Our sweet Ellis turned two last month. There was nothing sad or even bittersweet about it to me, surprisingly. She has just gotten more fun with age, and every milestone is really exciting right now.
We had so many celebrations! That Saturday we had her birthday party at Queens County Farm Museum. It's just five minutes from us, and somewhere she loves to go. She was absolutely overjoyed. She had her friends there, got to feed animals, go on a hay ride (she was obsessed with the tractor, wouldn't take her eyes off it to look out to the farm!), and just run wild in the wide open spaces. She had a Daniel Tiger cake and was a pro at blowing out candles. She has seen enough other birthdays by now (especially at day care) that she gets that it's a celebration of her, that we sing a song, that she gets to blow out candles and eat cake, and that she gets presents. She doesn't understand WHY we do all this, but she doesn't care - she just knows it's her turn! She was in heaven all day, so I was too.
Monday, her actual birthday, I took the day off work and we went to an indoor playspace together (it was raining). I had visions of baking a little cake together in the morning, and even measured out ingredients in advance to save myself from ruining the memories with frustration. But she just wasn't interested! She liked pouring in the eggs I had pre-cracked into individual cups, but nothing else. She dumped over a cup of sugar and then asked to go watch Daniel Tiger. I used the batter to make a small cake for that night, and a dozen cupcakes to send to day care the next day. We had my wife's family over for dinner and ordered in Thai; there is a chicken and broccoli dish that Ellis just loves. Then the next day she got to celebrate with her friends at day care.
Our little two year old. She is such a spitfire, and I am on an absolute high every day with her. I find that being at work actually increases my patience with her, because I have such a "break" away. I have a different type of appreciation for our time together now, and it's just so wonderful. She is so smart and funny and affectionate.
I need to note all the quirky things, because they change and/or disappear so fast. I need to freeze this moment, which is what journaling is for!
For a while she would say "more" to ANYTHING, even if she already had it! It's like she just couldn't get enough. Like she would point out the moon - "look, mama! moon! see?" and then ask, "more moon? more?" Like...it's right there!
She has been experimenting with emotions. It started months ago with saying her trains (which have faces) were crying. She would ask me to kiss them, and then say "all better!" She would do this over and over again. Now she does it with me. She hits me lightly and says, "You sad, mama?" I'll say yes and pretend to cry, and she'll hug and kiss me and say, "all better now, mama? happy now?" And then do it again. She recently added "mad" into the mix. It's so fascinating to watch her rehearse these with me!
Her interaction with us is incredible to watch. "Wha' doing, mama? Where going? Wha' that?" Always wanting to know, and being able to ask.
She knows who is Mama and who is Mommy, and is quick to correct other people.
She can repeat anything we say to her, but some morph into a version that's easier to pronounce. For the longest time, she said "peepaste" and "peebrush" for toothpaste and toothbrush. In the past week, it has evolved to "fuffpaste" and "fuffbrush." (She still says "peepop" for lollipop!) Our favorite was "oofwun." It translates directly as "other one," and she would use it to indicate that one or this one as well. See also "oofway": other way/this way/that way. We started saying it that way too, in an effort to keep it around just a little bit longer, but we did eventually lose it a week ago. Every newly correct pronunciation requires a mourning period for us! Unlike other gains which all feel exciting, maturing language is just surprisingly heartbreaking.
Ellis has branched into more independent play, but not for long if I'm not in the room. It's still hard for me to get much done with her around unless she's watching TV, which I don't want to overuse. But in the morning she can watch Daniel Tiger while I shower, and that has been a HUGELY helpful change. I don't have to close her in the bathroom with me anymore. (Our shower is upstairs, so running/crawling freely wasn't really an option.)
Ellis has outgrown the hitting/pushing/kicking phase, thankfully. This makes public outings SO much easier! She's gotten a little less territorial, and is more likely to use her words, at least at first, giving me time to intervene if needed before it escalates. She has also had a dramatic reduction in tantrums. Tantrums peaked from about 15 to 18 months, when she started having so many feelings and needs that she struggled to express. Now she has enough words to get across what she needs, and can usually accept an explanation if it's not something she can do or have. She might protest, cry for 20 seconds, but rarely throws herself to the ground and never for more than a few seconds. She gets it even if she doesn't like it, and I think I'm fair enough about permitting what I can when I can that she's okay with the limits I have to set sometimes. I know this is very likely to change in the next year or two as she becomes more willful and is trying to assert her independence, but for now language has made things sooo much easier in this department.
Nicole and I have slightly differing views on things like discipline, but not enough to confuse her. As just one example, Ellis knows Mommy does time-outs (never isolating her, though) and that Mama sits with her for a "break" and explains what's going on. We've stopped battling on this because we see that she responds to both styles just fine, and she doesn't get confused; she knows what to expect with whom, and that the message is the same - "this is not acceptable behavior." We're finding our groove as parents with different personalities, one more rigid and one more flexible. Where it takes work is when we're together, making sure we are respecting one another's methods and not undermining each other in front of Ellis. We've gotten much better with that, and it shows when we are working with her together. I'm grateful that just one of us isn't the disciplinarian while the other one gets to be "fun," so I'll accept this happily!
Ellis is, and has been for a long time, very nurturing with her dolls and stuffies. She has Daniel Tiger figurines that she pats to sleep at LEAST once a day, and she'll pat dolls against her chest and say "shhh, relax, relax." She loves pushing them in the stroller, and having them take turns. She recreates much of what she sees happen with the couple of infants at day care, and it just melts me to see her being Mama.
I am so excited for this summer!
