As A Driven Leaf

We had our second meeting with the rabbi today. We've been trying to schedule it for months, and there has always been a conflict either on our end our hers, so it was nice to finally sit down again. We just missed the last round of Judaism classes and are waiting for the next to start, and the rabbi didn't want us to have to wait that long to be able to start our process. I'm an eager student, so this suited me just fine, but the logistics of getting together on a weeknight have been tough.

Because it had been a while since our first meeting, we spent some time chatting about what's been going on in our lives (not much, it turns out!) before delving back into conversion talk. Rabbi asked our impressions of services so far, especially while we are yet to receive education about what is going on. I told her that the biggest thing that struck me from early on was the similarity to my Catholic upbringing, as far as the structure of services. There is singing, praying, standing, sitting, a sermon - even turning to one another to say "Shabbat Shalom" or "Good Shabbos" reminds me of the sign of peace in Catholicism. I told her that it was familiar and comforting, and in a way that is meaningful and spiritually significant for me, which is nice since I don't know what everything means and don't always understand exactly what is going on.

I also shared (since Nicole clams up in these meetings) that Nicole, who is a generally anxious and high-strung person, has expressed feeling calmer and more centered after going to temple, and that we both notice a difference in her the weeks that we have missed. Rabbi started talking about how "Shalom" means "peace" and how Shabbat is meant to be a day to rest and refresh your soul, in whatever way is meaningful for you. (Another example of a loose interpretation allowed by Reform Judaism - in more conservative sects, there are specific actions that are allowed or not allowed, but in Reform, it's whatever for YOU is restful and refreshing.) She brought over the prayer book that we use in services and broke down one of the hymns that is a literal translation of some verses from Genesis, and tied that in to what Nicole had brought up. I love, love, love being able to start a conversation based on our experience and have Rabbi use her knowledge to connect it to Judaism. It's such a powerful way for me to learn.

While speaking about the intentions for Shabbat, Rabbi suggested we start thinking about small ways that we might want to honor Shabbat at home, such as by lighting Shabbat candles. I told her that we both love reading and sharing what we're reading, whether with magazines, books, etc., so we had been looking for books that we could read aloud from together. Rabbi got excited and started talking about all kinds of books, and wrote down suggestions for us. She flitted around her office looking at different ones that she had in mind, based on our answers to her questions about what we find engaging and helpful, and then lent us one called "As A Driven Leaf" by Milton Steinberg. The summary on the back says, "The magnificent work of modern fiction that brings the age of the Talmud to life, and explores the times of Elisha ben Abuyah, whose struggle to live in two worlds destroyed his chances to live in either." Ooooooh.

This book is perfect for Reform because it addresses the conflict between religion and science, and how we grapple with that as people who identify as both intellectual and spiritual. It's a novel utilizing a real-life character who first rocked the boat by suggesting to the "sages" (elder rabbis) that perhaps you don't need to reject religion or reject science, but instead can embrace both, using science as a basis for faith and vice versa. The struggle for intellectual but deeply religious Jews who were thirsty for the knowledge being gained by the Greeks is real, and Milton Steinberg humanizes that large-scale struggle by creating this tale around a real person from history who first made waves. It's SO ME that I can't even handle it. It's light reading just in that it's a novel, not heavy nonfiction, but it's so intelligently written that it reads like a college assignment.

Originally we were going to read a chapter or two every Shabbat together, but we were excited to see what it was about and started tonight. Then we realized the chapters are pretty short and we could easily and happily do one a day, which also clears the way for more of Rabbi's recommended reading afterward. This evening we read the prologue and first chapter, and then talked about it. It felt like our own little book club and religious study. (Granted, we had been talking about more of a daily prayer type book when we first mentioned it to Rabbi but must not have communicated that clearly, and now that we are reading from this book daily, we STILL need to think of a way to honor Shabbat that is different from the rest of the week!)

Rabbi said today that she loves teaching children, but that she has a special place in her heart for teaching adults because they have a whole different appreciation for what they're learning. I must agree - I don't think I ever expected the process of conversion to be so exciting and enjoyable!